Monday, May 11, 2009

My new room at Sloan Kettering

Wednesday, January 14, 2009.
Bilateral (Double) Mastectomy.
12 Lymph Nodes removed on the left side.
5 Lymph Nodes removed on the right side.

My new bedroom for the next couple of days was a busy one. There were people in and out, my mom sleeping on a chair, and drains and plugs all hooked into my arms and breasts. But the most uncomfortable of all, the nurse. She was a blonde nightmare. The poor girl next to me (she had some kind of stomach cancer) was puking every 5 minutes. And the nurse would come in and yell to her, "How ya doing honey?" How do you think she was doing? The poor thing couldn't keep down a glass of water! Ugh. Everytime she came in, my mom said the corners of my mouth would go down. I became tense and disturbed. She was so loud, she didn't know my name and was simply impatient and harsh.


But I can't keep ranting on this nurse, or I might have a meltdown right here.

Anyhow...so staying in the hospital was certainly an experience. I had never stayed overnight before and am hoping I'll never have to again. The hospital itself is amazing! Doctors, amazing! Treatment, amazing! (Nurse, not so great). But again, Sloan Kettering, amazing!

Plus, my friends and family were always there. Mommy and Dana slept over alternating nights. I had visitors, flowers, and more visitors. My phone was ringing off the hook so much, that on the last day, we actually asked no one to come because I couldn't stay asleep -- I didn't want to miss anything!

Once I was feeling up to it, we took some rounds around the floor and met some other people who had surgery that week. Everyone just kept saying, "but you're so young. Oh my gosh. You're so young! How old are you?" Ugh; I know!!! We came across this woman who asked if I wanted to join the "Look Good, Feel Good" meeting later in the afternoon. At first, I was hesitant to go. She was a beautiful, older, Park Avenue-looking lady who seemed a bit snobby on the outside. She was the one to teach all of the women who underwent breast cancer surgery (lumpectomy/mastectomy) how to apply makeup. I was thinking, "Ugh. All I need is this be-otch telling me how to apply foundation on my skin, when I just had the most horrific thing happen to me."

Again, I hesitated. But thought I might as well learn something. After 2 minutes, I was so happy I went. I met wonderful, strong, women who were going through what I went through. Who were older than me, but just as scared. The Park Avenue lady began speaking and she suddenly became an angel to me.

She spoke of her experience with cancer and how she was a dancer on Broadway and continued to dance throughout her whole treatment. She said, "Girls, you put some makeup on and a wig and you get out there and live!"

And that's exactly what I've been doing.

Blonde, black, short, long, layered, bob, you name it, I wear it. I've never had so many compliments on my hair in my life!

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